Dear Sourdough Starter,
Consider this a new start for us. Things will be better from here on out.
I know we’ve had our problems in the past. I’ve treated you badly, I’ve wronged you so many times. Our relationship has been one of horrid neglect, hunger pangs, and mold.
I’ve starved you, dropped you, fed you to the compost monster, yelled at you, asked you to perform miraculous things that you’re incapable of doing. I’m sure in this painful past you would have screamed out in pain if you only had a mouth. The abuse ends here. I know now that I can’t expect you to transform into a beautiful, bubbling, sour smelling batch of goodness if I don’t nurture your sourdough spirit. I’ve turned a new leaf and I hope you’ll join me in this brand new life together.
This time is going to be different. I’m going to treat you right. I promise not to neglect you. You will be fed a nutritious meal of flour and water every day so you can grow big and strong. With my tender loving care, you will bloat into the stinky, yeasty starter you’ve always dreamed you could be.
Our new relationship is going to be one of mutual respect and care. For my part, I’ll take the responsibility to lovingly feed you, stir you, and throw half of you away every day. Never again will you starve to death. I won’t allow you to become coated in mold. I won’t forget you.
In return you’ll grow and ferment. You’ll turn deliciously sour and lend your wonderful stink to our nutritious and amazing bread. I’ll feed you and you’ll feed us. It’s the way it should have been all along.
I’m going to take care of you. My days of neglect and mistreatment are over. I’m going to make a point to make time in my life for you. Every day for the next week will be spent bowing down to your all mighty sourdough attributes. You’re the King of Breads and your time to rule has finally come.